Boundaries

So what are boundaries?

                   They're basically limits , like the geographical boundary of a government. The boundaries are used as a protection. Apart from geographic boundaries, they are present in theories , emotional , physical and mental states, etc . Every person has their boundaries and if one doesn't, then I say should have .

                    I never really realised how important having boundaries were. Even after studying about people fighting for their boundaries, invading other regions to extend their boundaries, the wars , the uprisings , the struggle and everything in history all my school life , I didn't. We were taught history nd geography for the knowledge of the events, for its reasons, but never made to realise what was it's importance and applications in our lives now. They taught us the importance of the events and how our lives are now changed because of it , definitely and I wouldn't deny that we haven't learnt something from our those classes . It's just that we didn't learn how important it was to interpret all of it to our present life.

                     Yes we know and claim our rights, value our freedom,etc but we don't have it very right yet. . Coming back and talking about the one thing that is " boundaries" for now. Nowadays , like very recently people have started to talk about mental and emotional health and also spread awareness about it We have now begun to understand it's importance and effects on our lives.

                   One such thing in our mental health is boundaries. So.........

What are boundaries?

Who sets the boundaries?

What is it's importance?

What are effects of not setting boundaries?

What is a healthy boundary? etc are the many questions that arise.

   But before I talk about it (I mean write ) , to be clear ; I'm no psychologist, psychoanalyst, or any sort of expert in mental health or something here. Just a student that's studies psychology for a couple years and finds it interesting. Whatever I write are what I've come to understand , and observe ,and are my opinions/perspectives on things. You could find certain things not fitting to you but that's okay , we're different people and could have different takes on things. So just try reading with an open mind.

          

What are boundaries?

          Boundaries as I earlier mentioned are a set of limits. For an individual , they are the limits to which others have access to us and / or our lives. They are the physical , emotional and mental boundaries we set for other's in our lives.

Who sets the boundaries?

          Every individual sets thei6own boundaries according to what fits them best. Everyone's different and their dynamics of the boundary would be too. It totally depends upon the people themselves , how far they want to set the boundary.

What is it's importance?

          Boundaries are set to protect out personal space. Physically if there's a certain distance/behaviour/gesture that we're not comfortable with, we set boundaries. Boundaries are also set between different aspects and sections of our life. It is important to keep these , to maintain a general peace.

What are the effects of not setting boundaries?

          Not setting boundaries is just like running a city without an administration /rules or people to protect them. Basically a messed up situation. When we don't set these boundaries , people don't know their limits, behave however they want , don't take any responsibility and if anything happens then the blame is on you.  You give people the chance to take you for granted, by letting them have an upper hand.

What is a healthy boundary?

          A healthy boundary according to me is the one that's not set on the grounds of any fear, trauma or other egative emotions. It's well balanced, keeps people at the right distance where they have a certain level of access to you but at the same time it protects you by helping you maintain a balanced mental and 

 state.

          Here I'm done with questions.  Now, just  because I'm speaking about it doesn't men that I've got this perfected. Believe me I haven't. No one really has , everyone tends to mess it up somewhere or the other. But the point is to be better, better than a year ago, a month ago , a week ago , yesterday and even the moment before . Better than ourselves and not necessarily others. I myself never actually realised it's importance for a long time. Even now I'm trying to figure it out , apply it , set it properly etc. It's part of life. I'm learning , to set them right, maintain them and the most important thing is staying away from people who don't respect our boundaries. Because if you wouldn't like someone barging into your house anytime, against your will, I wouldn't like it either. So we all must respect each other and our boundaries.

With this I wish you all good health and keep trying to be a better you.

All the love ,

Disha💜✨